One of the hardest parts of I find to practicing unconditional love is being able to maintain this state of being when I am in a challenging situation with someone. It’s very easy to love someone unconditionally when they are agreeing with you or doing what you want them to do! 😅
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It is very common for us to want to protect ourselves from the painful emotions experienced when we take responsibility for our role in the situation.
We can protect ourselves from these emotions by using strategies such as blaming them, judging them, black and white thinking, focussing on the wrong that we have experienced and refusing to discuss or hear their side.
These strategies also separate us from the other person’s experience as well however. It is much harder to be loving and forgiving towards someone you are feeling disconnected from.
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Key to maintaining a state of unconditional love regardless of what you are experiencing is by remembering firstly that we are here to have different experiences in which to learn and expand our own consciousness. And that everyone else is here for the same reason.
In order to have different experiences dual roles or duality has been created. We can’t have one role without the other. We can’t be the ‘good’ guy if there are no ‘bad’ guys. We can’t be the victim if there is no abuser.
These roles have now become so separate however that we now demonise’ the ‘bad’ roles, creating judgement and polarity. We can’t love from a state of polarity.
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The second thing to remember is that we are all connected, all pieces of the same ‘higher-soul’. Therefore, as a collective we all benefit from the lessons from others experiences.
It also means that what one is experiencing we are also experiencing. We can’t separate ourselves from other’s experiences. What we do to others we do to ourselves. Treat others as you would be treated.
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When I am having difficulty moving out of judgement, blame etc then I take a moment to say to myself "Oh! Here I am, experiencing...". Insert whatever it is that you feel the OTHER person is feeling and needing right now.
It also helps if you can think of a time when you have behaved the way that person is right now. If you can’t then it can be helpful to remind yourself that, being the multi-dimensional infinite being that you are, it is likely that you would have experienced this at some point.
If that doesn’t help then remind yourself that this person is experiencing this so that you don’t have.
By reminding myself of our unified experience it helps me to shift out of polarity and back into unity and unconditional love for all.
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Once I am connected into this feeling again I am more able to respond with compassion for myself and the other person(s). I am able to act ion resolving this situation from a place of love not anger or fear.
Unconditional love doesn’t mean that I willingly accept abusive behaviour. Part of the experiences we are here to learn could be around learning how to end an unhealthy situation or abusive patterns on this planet in a loving and compassionate way.
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We don’t end this behaviour by using judgement and shame - this just perpetuates the polarity template and our 3D framework.
We end victim/abuser templates by growing to a state of unconditional love to the extent that, collectively, we no longer need this duality framework to expand.
Moving from duality and separateness to unity and oneness is part of the transition to 5D consciousness.
